


Compliments(TM)

by TenSpencerRiedPlease



Category: Doctor Strange (2016), Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, Arno is his twin bro, Humor, I Don't Even Know, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, No Plot/Plotless, Random & Short, Tony Being Tony, Tony gets a sibling, also theres some lowkey sadness covered by jokes in true Tony Stark fashion, because i took artistic license, like a pro, reasons, seriously i have no idea what this is, why
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-15
Updated: 2018-01-15
Packaged: 2019-03-05 03:32:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13379238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TenSpencerRiedPlease/pseuds/TenSpencerRiedPlease
Summary: “No, no, no, I’m serious,” he says very dramatically, waving his hands around in a way that makes Tony laugh. “Imagine for a moment you have a twin,” he continues, still using a serious tone. “And this twin is an identical twin, yeah? But because your parents are weird and gave one up for adoption you don’t know, but you find out. Only when you meet the twin you find out you’re the ugly one. Imagine having an identical twin and still being the ugly sibling! I’d throw myself off a bridge,” Stephen says in a matter-of-fact tone that has them all howling with laughter.





	Compliments(TM)

**Author's Note:**

> So uh, because I feel this needs explanation I was creeping people I used to go to high school with, which involved a pair of identical twins and there was an uglier one. Which somehow birthed... this. No hate to the uglier siblings, I'm the ugly sibling too so ugly siblings unite lol.
> 
> I used Arno for this because it made sense- in some comic canons he's Tony's brother (or cousin) so. Also I decided to play with race this time because I think Latino Tony would be interesting and it fit ok into this. And as always when I write him Stephen is Asian in this (from Nepal if you're looking for a specific country of origin). Also there's like a weird lack of representation of interracial couples in which both people are not white? So this is technically my first time writing that, but mostly this is humor covering sadness tbh. Seriously, I have no clue what this even is.
> 
> Warning for some referenced child abuse though.

It started with Christine telling him there was no way he could convince Stephen to go out but like all challenges Tony took he succeeded in proving his opponent wrong. Stephen had resisted, telling Tony he needed to study while clinging to his medical text for dear life but Tony took a page from his cat’s book and rolled all over Stephen and the book until he got annoyed enough to pay attention to him. From there it was convincing him that he deserved some time off, they guy had to work with _dead bodies_ sometimes for classes, anyone who had to handle the dead needed a shot Tony reasoned. After an hour of this and the realization that he wasn’t going to get Tony to go anywhere he finally sighs and agrees to go out just so he could get Tony off his book.

He tries valiantly to go back to his book but Tony shoos him away from it and into his closet to get changed.

*

Christine knew the value of a night out but Stephen practically _lived_ in his study area- how he even ended up in a relationship was beyond her. Actually no, after watching him and Stephen together she knew exactly how that happened. Apparently Tony discovered Stephen’s weakness by asking him questions about medical stuff and he’d been offended to learn Tony had no idea what half his body parts were. So he’d launched into an explanation that probably bored Tony to tears but it paid off because Tony somehow managed to get a date out of the encounter and now here they were.

Stephen didn’t drink often, which became abundantly clear abundantly fast but Tony finds drunk Stephen hilarious and after the conversation turns to insulting people they didn’t like they _all_ decided drunk Stephen was hilarious. “No, no, no, I’m serious,” he says very dramatically, waving his hands around in a way that makes Tony laugh. “Imagine for a moment you have a twin,” he continues, still using a serious tone. “And this twin is an _identical_ twin, yeah? But because your parents are weird and gave one up for adoption you don’t know, but you find out. Only when you meet the twin you find out you’re the ugly one. Imagine having an identical twin and _still_ being the ugly sibling! I’d throw myself off a bridge,” Stephen says in a matter-of-fact tone that has them all howling with laughter.

“You think Arno is the ugly one?” Tony asks, laughing.

“Everyone with _eyes_ thinks Arno is the ugly one,” Stephen says, dramatically leaning into the table towards Tony.

“We’re identical twins, how can there be an ugly one?” he asks.

“Okay like not to be a dick but I one hundred percent agree with that,” Peter says, leaning forward in the same dramatic fashion Stephen had. Christine shakes her head, wondering when the hell she ended up with such odd friends. Peter Quill was a _music_ major, how the hell did he end up friends with a couple of doctors in training, an engineer, and a bunch of humanities majors? No one even knew given that not one of their classes overlapped and no one could remember exactly how they all met.

“Are you sure you’re not fraternal twins because he genuinely is the ugly one,” Christine adds and Peter throws his hands up.

“The nice one said it, we aren’t dicks!” he yells triumphantly. Gamora rolls her eyes at him and takes his drink away, which was probably for the best.

Tony shrugs, “all I know is what he knows and apparently _I_ was the disposable twin,” he snaps, obviously still bitter about his origins. To be fair if Christine found out she was adopted by having her twin show up on her doorstep one day she wouldn’t be impressed, and finding out he was the one their parents gave up when they kept the other certainly wouldn’t help that sting on Tony’s end. As it turned out Arno had been pretty pissed that Tony got the life of everyone’s dreams being adopted by the Starks and so the brothers didn’t much care for one another because they both thought the other got the better deal. It didn’t help that their personalities seemed to clash too.

“You should have known you were adopted when you were Mexican,” Peter tells him, rolling his eyes dramatically.

“I thought I was Italian, they’re kind of brown!” he says in his own defense. It helped that his supposed father had an Italian background, which would explain Tony’s tanned skin but no. As it turned out he wasn’t even the race he thought he was though he was pale enough to pass for white even if he was on the darker end of white. Stephen had told Christine that hadn’t much helped Tony’s bitterness and she couldn’t say she blamed him for that.

“That’s a stretch,” Stephen tells him, “but you’re adorable so I’ll let it go.” Tony rolls his eyes at him as he wraps an arm around Tony’s waist and leans into his side. They all sit for a beat of silence before Steve speaks.

“I think someone lied about being identical twins because Arno really is less attractive than you,” he says, looking a little embarrassed to say that out loud but Christine attributes that to his generally polite nature.

“ _Ha_ , two nice people have said it, we’re double the not- dicks!” Peter says excitedly.

“Shut up,” Gamora hisses at him and Peter sticks his tongue out at her. He’s lucky she didn’t just cut it off and Christine is grateful for the restraint- she didn’t feel like trying to keep someone alive while drunk even if she was sure between her and Stephen they could do it.

“Well whatever, guess I’m the hot twin,” Tony says, shrugging.

“Yeah you are,” Stephen says with the utmost confidence. “Have you guys seen the Compliments version of a person before? Arno is the Compliments version of Tony,” he says and the rest of the table starts laughing. Tony laughs so hard he starts coughing and Stephen looks worried for a moment before he regains control of his breath.

“I always assumed Hammer was the Compliments version of me,” he says and Stephen shakes his head.

“Don’t be ridiculous, Compliments is still a brand. Hammer is the kind of knockoff you’d buy from a street vendor,” he says. Tony throws back his head and laughs again and Christine had to admit that was a pretty good insult. One that was good enough for her to file away for the next time someone annoyed her.

“Okay but like we should be nice to Arno,” Bucky says, earning a _very_ dirty look from Tony.

“What? He has an identical twin and he’s _still_ the ugly one,” he says. “That’s gotta hurt.”

“Plus by all accounts you _did_ get the better deal,” Steve adds and Tony flips him off.

“Did not, he only got a loving family and I got an abusive father that actively _chose_ me and he _still_ beat my ass every chance I got. He literally picked me up to be a punching bag! Cool cars do _not_ make up for that,” he says and the table goes silent.

“To be fair Howard _did_ die in a fiery car crash and you inherited a multi-million dollar company so I mean he got his comeuppance,” Stephen says, speaking when no one else was brave enough to.

Tony rolls his eyes, “and he took my mom with him, and _then_ I find out that surprise! I’m adopted and apparently Mexican? Come _on_. And it wasn’t even like Arno grew up poor, I could see his jealousy being a thing if that was the case but his family is middle class! I’d still rather be the one they kept,” he mumbles under his breath.

“Holy fuck if we’re going to do this right now I need more shots, Gamora, give me my drink back,” Peter says to her and she slides it back to him. They all sit in awkward silence for a moment before Stephen starts laughing again and Tony gives him an odd look.

“Could you imagine being the ugly identical twin? Life really sold him short, you should be happy that he’s jealous- even in a competition of identical genetics you won,” Stephen tells him and Tony snorts and starts laughing again.

“Yeah well, I’m competitive even in utero I guess,” he says, grinning.

*

Stephen lets out what was probably a death shudder as Tony gets out of bed. “Please resist moving the bed, I feel like I’m going to throw up whatever the hell I drank last night,” he mumbles.

“I told you to drink a glass of water and eat some bread but _no_ , you were all ‘I’m a _doctor_ Tony, I know how to take _care_ of myself Tony, because I’m a _doctor_ ’,” he says in a mocking tone that sounds nothing like Stephen. He risks rolling over just to flip Tony off and almost regrets it when he feels his stomach do what he imagined the sea did when a tsunami was about to hit. Except his tsunami would be vomit. He really didn’t want to toss his cookies in front of his boyfriend; they were so not at that level of comfort with one another.

“Please get me the anti-nausea meds I have in the cupboard above the bathroom sink,” he mumbles at Tony. Tony lets out a loud, put upon sigh but walks off to go save Stephen from his own stupidity. He should have listened to Tony and drank the water and eaten the bread. He didn’t even remember telling Tony he wasn’t going to do that because he was a doctor. This just solidified to him that he should never leave his study habits in favor of going out despite what Christine said about it being good for the soul. His soul now felt like it was going to vomit so obviously she was wrong.

Tony comes back with the medication and carefully crawls back into bed so he doesn’t jostle Stephen much. He gratefully takes the medication from Tony and doses himself with probably a little too much but at this point he didn’t care as long as he stopped feeling like he was about to die. Tony curls up beside him and Stephen smiles, pleased that he was still around even though he certainly wasn’t going to be useful company today. “If you want food, cherry popsicles taste just as good coming up as they do going down so it’s a good option,” he says and Stephen’s stomach rolls. He bolts out of bed knowing he has ten seconds _tops_ before he pukes everywhere. To his surprise Tony laughs instead of making some kind of grossed out noise and leaving. Thankfully for him he sticks around to take care of Stephen too.

“Eat the toast,” Tony tells him several hours later, shoving toast in Stephen’s general direction while Stephen moans and tries to avoid it.

“I am not hungry, please stop trying to feed me,” he mumbles.

“You need to eat something now eat the toast,” Tony says, literally throwing the toast on his head.

He makes an annoyed noise and pulls the toast off, “that had butter on it! Oh ew, now there’s a hair on it too,” he says, wrinkling his nose.

“Well its not my hair, that’s an Asian hair,” Tony says, pointing at it.

“You can’t tell that’s an Asian hair,” Stephen accuses.

“Can too,” Tony insists.

“How the hell can you tell that’s an Asian hair? They don’t even look any different than Mexican hairs,” he says. They felt different but no one was feeling up the hairy toast to figure out whose hair it was.

“I can tell it’s an Asian hair because the Asian guy has longer hair than me. That’s not my hair,” Tony says. “Plus it was on _your_ head. Simple deduction.”

“Oh yeah, you’re a regular Sherlock Holmes,” Stephen mumbles, pulling the hair off the toast and flicking it in Tony’s direction. He only eats the toast because there was the potential of it helping with the nausea and he did need to eat something given that he couldn’t remember the last time he ate. When Tony asks him if he feels better afterwards he lies and says he feels worse, than feigns sick so Tony will take care of him some more.

*

Stephen is _trying_ to study but Tony and Arno wouldn’t shut the hell up and leave him in peace. “Why are you so pissed off at me!” Tony yells.

“Because you’re _yelling at me!_ ” Arno yells back, waving his arms around. Stephen squints, trying to determine if he and Tony really were identical because they really didn’t look it.

“You started it!” Tony yells back.

“Did not!” Arno yells.

“Stop yelling, I have neighbors that I need to live beside after this!” Stephen yells at both of them. The brothers turn their glares to him for a half a second and Stephen really does think they should get a DNA test because there was no way they were identical twins. Tony really was the better-looking one. They give up on Stephen fast and turn back to glaring at each other.

“I can’t _believe_ you’re whining and crying about growing up rich! Technically you even grew up white, must be fucking nice to avoid racism!” Arno snaps.

“Oh, and you’re whining and crying about _not_ being thrown aside in favor of your bother while you got to grow up in a loving family is totally rational, huh? Give me a break,” Tony snaps back. “You have everything I ever wanted and you act like _money_ would have been better than all that. Well it _wouldn’t_ , take it from someone who lived it,” Tony says.

“You don’t even know what life outside that privilege is like, how the fuck can you give an accurate comparison?” Arno tells him, rolling his eyes.

“And I suppose you know what it’s like to have an abusive father is like so you can accurately compare your life to mine, hmm? Because let me tell you no amount of money is worth abuse,” Tony snaps, rolling his eyes right back at Arno.

Arno frowns, “wait, what?” he asks. Stephen accidentally lets out a noise of disgust and flinches when Tony and Arno turn to face him.

“What? You’ve been lusting after Tony’s life and you didn’t even know about the abuse he suffered at the hands of his father? Idiot,” he mumbles. “Tony was never whining about being rich, he was whining about Howard. And Tony, _everyone_ wants to be rich; stop acting like Arno is different for doing the same. There, problem solved, stop fighting in my living room, I have a doctorate to get and you two having a screaming match isn’t helping.”

For a moment Arno looks like he’s going to apologize or say something nice but Tony sticks his nose in the air and says, “Stephen thinks you’re the Compliments version of me,” and ruins it all.

“Oh for gods sakes,” Stephen mumbles, taking off his reading glasses to pinch the bridge of his nose in frustration.

“Take a good look at what money can buy Arno, because I am _definitely_ a name brand,” Tony tells him, nose still in the air.

“You are _such_ a prick,” Stephen tells him.

*

“What is _this_?” Stephen asks, gesturing to Tony and Arno, who were currently stuffed into a single white shirt that read ‘our get along shirt’. Tony was hanging from it like a rag doll while Arno held him up unwillingly given that they were currently sharing a garment.

“It’s a get along shirt but uh, Tony’s been making Arno drag his ass around everywhere for the last hour and he refuses to support his own weight,” Peter says, frowning.

“It’s a metaphor for his life,” Arno mumbles.

“Oh _fuck_ you, I support my own weight!” Tony snaps back.

“You got adopted by rich parents, you never would have ended up where you were without that,” Arno tells him.

“Says the guy who couldn’t think himself out of a simple math trivia question from McDonald’s. Its not my fault I’m so much smarter than you,” he says, sounding remarkably like Gretchen Wieners from Mean Girls. The irony is one hundred percent lost of both Tony and Arno.

“This obviously isn’t working,” he tells Peter.

“Nah, they’re acting like normal siblings,” Peter says, “total success.”

“I hope you die in hell fire,” Arno tells Tony and Stephen raises an eyebrow at Peter because he was clearly wrong about this working.

“I hope a bird shits directly in your mouth,” Tony counters and Stephen wrinkles his nose. Eww.

“I hope one of your stupid precious robots dies,” Arno fires back and Tony stands up.

“Okay, you know _what_!” he starts but Stephen jumps in fast, grabbing Tony’s head because he knew exactly what he was about to do.

“Don’t you _dare_ , if you get a concussion it could have some very long lasting affects and we don’t know why the brain does those things yet!” he says, worried about Tony’s key to success. Contrary to Arno’s opinion Stephen thought Tony would have ended up in a similar place in life regardless of his rich parents, even if it would have undoubtedly been harder for him. But Tony was tenacious and had a bad habit of never backing down- he would have gotten _somewhere_ in life regardless of Howard and Maria Stark adopting him. But for now Stephen would protect his brain in _this_ life, not the one he could have potentially had if he grew up as the middle class Mexican Arno.

“I’ll risk it,” Tony snarls, trying his best to glare at Arno despite Stephen holding his head still. He lets go only for Arno to antagonize Tony some more, which wasn’t a wise move given that Stephen only just saved him form a potential headbutt.

“Try me, bitch,” Arno snaps at him and yelps, jumping in his place and knocking both him and Tony over. Tony lands on Arno and goes back to playing limp while Arno wiggles around underneath of him. “You stomped on my toes you asshole!” he yells.

“You asked for it, literally,” Tony tells him.

“Get off me, you’re fucking crushing me!” Arno wheezes out.

“Good, then _perish_ ,” Tony says, refusing to move as Arno tries and fails to throw him off because they’re both stuck in a single shirt.

“This was an awful idea,” Stephen says to Peter.

“You don’t have siblings do you?” he asks.

Stephen frowns, “do you?” Because he was pretty sure Peter was an only child like he was. Well, technically he had a sister but she died young so she didn’t count, not really given that he didn’t get all that long with her even if he would have rather liked to have a sibling…

“No, but I know lots of people with siblings and trust me this is normal. They like… get violent and shit, someone’s probably going to bleed,” he says.

“My sister may have died when I was ten, but I don’t remember every trying murder her. She certainly never tried to murder me. I mean she was _four_ but still,” he says. “I don’t think this is normal.”

Arno lets out a yelp, “you _bit_ me!” he yells.

“You stuck your hand in my mouth!” Tony yells back.

“Did _not_!” Arno yells.

“I wouldn’t bite you on purpose, I have _standards_ ,” Tony tells him.

“You have standards on who you _bite_? What the fuck!” Arno yells at him. “Who _bites_ people?”

“Someone’s boring in the bedroom,” Tony mumbles and Stephen speaks up.

“Alright, nope, we are leaving our sex life _out_ of this!” he tells Tony, who makes a face.

“Biting is not sexy, its cannibalistic,” Arno tells Tony, who makes an offended noise.

“Jesus Christ, there’s a difference between a love bite and taking a fucking chunk out of Stephen and swallowing it, Arno. Its not my fault you’re so painfully vanilla you can’t figure that out,” Tony snaps.

“What the hell is ‘vanilla’? Besides the flavoring obviously,” Arno says.

Tony rolls his eyes so hard it was a wonder they didn’t roll out of his head and back out the door. “I pity the person who shares a bed with you,” he mumbles.

“Not gunna lie, so do I,” Peter says.

Stephen waits for a few moments before he sighs, “vanilla is a term people who are into kink use to describe people who aren’t into kink,” he tells Arno, who makes a scandalized noise.

“Oh so you’re a _pervert_?” he asks.

“Better than a prude,” Tony fires back.

Stephen sighs, “get them out of that shirt, I have a date with Tony and I am _not_ dragging Arno along so I can listen to this all night.”

*

Natasha steps back, deciding her handiwork was done and the room was official inescapable. “There, now they get a get along _room_ and hopefully they can work out their resentment towards each other,” she says, clapping her hands together and looking pleased. “And we have two doctors on standby in case they kill each other,” she adds.

Christine shoots Stephen a worried look and he shrugs, “there was biting last time,” he says and Christine stares at the door in horror, obviously preparing for the worst.

“You know if they just accepted they’re both right this would all stop,” Steve points out.

“When do you know Tony to give up if he thinks he’s right?” Stephen asks him and Steve sighs.

“Well lets hope you and Christine can stop the bleeding,” he says.

They all wait outside playing go fish and trying to listen in on whatever conversation was happening in there but they couldn’t hear anything. “Do you think one stabbed the other quietly?” Peter asks eventually. “Also Natasha go fish I don’t have fours.” Natasha flips him off and grabs a card from the deck.

“If they did I hope Tony won, my parents want to meet him,” Stephen says and Christine raises an eyebrow.

“You’re bringing him home?” she asks.

He makes a face, “I have no choice, my mother threatened to drop in unexpectedly and she and Tony would get along too well to be left unsupervised in my apartment,” he says. It was a lie and Christine knew it but he had a reputation to keep so she lets it slide.

“I’d love to meet your mother, your stories make her sound awesome,” Tony says and they all jump about five feet in the air. Tony and Arno look pleased with themselves for causing this reaction and Natasha looks towards the door, then Tony and Arno, and then back to the door.

“We got out through a vent after coming to the mutual agreement that we’d rather kill ourselves than spend another second in the presence of the other,” Tony says.

Christine shakes her head, “that is _dedication_.”

“Turns out we have that in common but Arno is still too stupid to figure out that air vents lead to other places so I was the one that got us out,” Tony says, nose in the air.

“Yeah, _after_ you ran head first into the window like a fucking demented pigeon,” Arno says, rolling his eyes.

“Tony, head injuries!” Stephen tells him, shaking his head. “Why are you like this?”

“You’d run head first into a window if you had to be exposed to Arno for a prolonged period of time too,” Tony mumbles.

“That’s true, I’d rather go through a window than spend time with Gamora too,” Nebula says and Stephen shares a skeptical look with Christine.

“Are siblings actually like this?” he asks but she shrugs.

“I’m an only child,” she says.

“Ten out of ten confirmed, if I had a sibling I’d run into a window to escape them too,” Peter says and Arno stares at them all like they’re idiots.

“I can’t believe you’re all on board with this, this is absolutely ridiculous,” he says.

“You only think that because you’re the Compliments to my Gucci,” Tony tells him, nose in the air.

Arno frowns, “that doesn’t even make sense Tony, one is a food brand and the other is fashion.”

“Fine, you’re the shitty chicken nugget to my three thousand dollar brogues,” Tony says, rolling his eyes. Arno still looks lost but Stephen cracks up at that.

“Fine, point proven, you hate each other. Please tell me you like Thai food, my mom loves it and she’ll instantly hate you if you don’t also love it. She’s very finicky,” Stephen says.

Tony shrugs, “I’m not picky with food. So when do I get to meet you mom? Because I want all the details of every embarrassing person you’ve ever brought home,” he says, grinning.

“Well you aren’t going to get any, Stephen has never brought anyone home,” Christine tells him.

“That is _disgustingly_ sweet,” Nebula says in such a bitter tone that the touched look on Tony’s face disappears. Stephen throws his cards at her because that was rude. She doesn’t look fussed at all despite his efforts.

**Author's Note:**

> [My writing Tumblr](https://tenspencerriedplease.tumblr.com/)


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